!st Day of Life

Reading people's blog.. From friends.. all of them said.. blogging can release your Pressure.. or wtv inside.. Though i'm nt really planning to spill all my personal life here. but.. yeah.. just wanna try it out and if it does work.. i'll think about it ^^
Today is the 1st day. 1st breath of this blog. so.. dont expect much..
This blog is 1 day younger than me so to speak.. so.. lets see how it goes..
Yesterday.. went out with friends.. went to watch... tat CROC movie.. its was.. somehow.. bored.. and short.. BUT FULLLLL OF SUSPENS AND BLOOOD >.< lol but it was kinda shocking each time tat 6 m long corc come and bite someone off. haha..
Its been almost 2 week now. ( if those whom are close. You would understand ) life is somehow.. short.. and long. i wish it would end now. after THAT incident. dont really have much will/reason to live. though this may sound stupid but i've gone through this and its very very LONG.. last one took 4 years just to get my mind of her. This is really tiring.. After i've put my heart to it.. and *puff* its gone.. I REALLY DO LOVE HER !!! but what can i do ? or.. What should i do ? wanna few choices ?
1 . Shot myself in the head and get over with it ?
2 . Go for another try when she said its impossible ?
3 . Stone around and wait till she turns back ? ( almost impossible for her )
4 . Just give up and go look for one whom i can love ?
5 . Just give up and go back to what took my 2.5 years to retire from ?
6 . Give up girls..
Still dont know.. anyone ? pls help..